Yup, gifts… sometimes imperceptible, they are always there, even though they appear to be mere caricatural fantasies, they do really exist. Maybe they are not exactly as we imagine them or maybe we have no idea of how they work. My young self would wonder which gifts I might have. I remember that at a certain age I used to come along with my mom to her home visits and normally her patients were very old, I recall that I had a great time with them, there was something that made me feel at ease and they also felt cheerfull to see me there.
If im honest I had a better time with them than with my friends at school, hehe. I guess because it was, in fact, one of my gifts, my parents as they saw this vocation(Fundamental word) in me, they imagined their daughter being a geriatrician or something like that. It was something I also accepted, not only because my parents liked the idea, but because I liked it too and felt that sort of vocation. I have to clarify that I was really young and didn't know anything about how the world worked, much less I knew what it meant to find your real vocation. So, I asked my parents what did it meant to have a vocation and they explained to me that it was far beyond something that you liked to do, it was about feeling the calling to a certain profession or action that would fulfill me so much so, that those who would approach me for this reason, would be fortunate just for the fact that it was going to be done from the heart and not only for the mere act of just doing it.
We know that it's not the same to like something than to feel the calling to a certain profession or activity that turns out to be easy for us, we enjoy it and literally fulfills our soul.
It goes beyond money and success, it is the calling and everyone, absolutely everyone comes with it.
Although it may appear obvious what our gifts are, we sometimes get caught on to what's culturally acceptable. Gifts manifest, again and again, they never cease, that which is your gift, maybe invisible in your eyes, but would never cease until you truly see it.
They are a tool, entities on its own, part of the universe, just like us. They are assigned and are there to help us and others. Just like there are stars, there are gifts, with different natures and ways to operate. But all, are at the service of the universe and those who have the fortune to find them will know that they exist for the greater good.
While they help us tremendously with our self-improvement, they are mainly for the collective and for that reason it is so important to get to know them and give them the chance to operate.
An angel once told me that gifts have to be respected and treated just like a person. If you don't believe in your gifts, it is like not believing in someone dear to us, is closing the door on them and not letting them exist. They work in such a way that you have no authority above them, they are simply there and in the same way they are a tool from divine energy, you are the tool in which they can manifest. You are the channel for those gifts, gifts are pure and come directly from source. Therefore, no one has control over them. The only thing that we have to do it's LETTING them express and do their job, without this constant need of dominating that we tend to have us, humans.
Now, im going to talk to you a little bit about how my gifts decided to manifest in my life.
Like I was telling you before, when I was younger I loved to be for some reason with elderly people that were near passing to the other side, really old and sick. I used to talk to them and I felt whole and happy. From outside, of course, there were those who thought it was a bit odd, even strange.
After going through significant loses over this same reason and thanks to the fact that I was getting older and starting to have another type of social interactions, I started to develop an interest in music, so I asked my dad for an electric guitar, but to be honest, I realized that I prefer to listen to it, rather than playing it… so I decided not to go through that route. Later on, I discovered that I enjoyed making arts and crafts, plus painting; so I enrolled in ceramics and painting classes. The ceramic, I ditched and the painting aspect stayed. Around the same time, I had a fascination with photography, so I began to capture photos, that activity, as well as painting, never left me, the sad part was that I put so many expectations on my shoulders and that blocked me creatively.
I LOVED to write, but writing for me was a forbidden thing, a secret. My sister, eleven years older than me, also painted and wrote; by the way, she still does, she even has a book. Very admired by the family for this gift, I, on the other hand, would compare myself a lot, not in a conscious way, but it affected my decisions. I chose photography, something of my own, I thought. And yes, I love photography, in fact, later on, became a professional photographer. But I observed that choosing that path came from the fear to be compared. And when the time came for me to choose a career, very unconsciously, I chose one that involved a lot of writing, social anthropology.
I found out that one of my many tastes was in the field of social sciences, but what I really wanted to do was just simply write. I enjoyed a lot my career, cause I had a platform in which I could express that desire, a desire that I forbid myself, the reason behind it, being fearful of criticism and comparison.
I realized that it was a true passion for me in the career and luckily I had the opportunity to publish one or two essays. While I was finding this for myself, there was a point where my creativity to write was limited in the scientific format and I started to get tired and wasn't liking it as much. When I wanted to make a picture in my head as that being my profession, something didn't quite click. So, I decided to drop out of college just before I was going to start writing my thesis and two teachers and one classmate made the same remark “never stop writing”. That stayed in my head, but I was so tired and fed up with writing so much in a scientific format, that when I drop out, the least I wanted to do was to write and of course I wasn't aware that I could write whatever I wanted. I guess I didn't want it to be unleashed.
I followed my instinct with photography, something that I've loved to do since the beginning and so I got my degree as a professional photographer. But well, oh well, hehe, yet again it wasn't something that fulfilled me 100% and of course, I enjoyed it, but never in the same degree as counseling and expressing myself through writing.
Once again, I felt that I was at a crossroads, now in an age where my ex-classmates were graduating and looking for Jobs. Im in the dilemma of what I wanted to do with my life, ha. My gifts of course, always manifesting, but because I felt so guilty and afraid of being judged and I was putting myself expectations that I could never exceed, I wasn't hearing them clearly.
Long story short, some years later I realized that one of my true callings was writing, see (that manifested with photography) beyond and serve others.
Like I've told you in other blog entries, what triggered me to see my true callings was that I tried to find myself by going to therapy and when I started to heal my maternal karma, bum... Everything started from there.
I knew that I was always there, I always felt it, saw it for brief periods of time, but the filters that I imposed myself, dictated what I “had” to see and do.
I then decided that I was going to write, even if I was “bad” and paint even if I thought it was “ugly”. I admitted to myself that in fact, the gift to serve and see was always there, so I gave it a chance and practice. It wasn't easy, because I was afraid to be myself, we all have that fear. But I thought that if I did it in an informal way, like a game, just testing, I wasn't going to feel the same pressure that I felt before when making rigid and formal decisions. One thing led to another and here I am, doing what I would always loved to do.
Although the road might seem long if your search is to find yourself, your gifts and you will eventually find each other. Today, I see that if I would have not studied social anthropology, I might not have the same perspectives of the world that help me in this job and most likely I wouldn't have discovered that writing was a real passion and that I wasn't “as bad” as I thought. I proved myself if you wanna see it that way.
As Henri Matisse (One of my favorite artists, because he was always him) said “Creativity takes courage”, that's the only thing we need. The courage to see beyond our own expectations and try. Creativity is that divine energy that is expressed through many mediums, one being our gifts. They go hand in hand.
Just by following what your heart dictates, even if it's difficult and comes with a lot of fear, you would be fulfilling your mission here. DO whats uncomfortable, you'll see that the state in which you were before wasn't comfortable at all, all the contrary is a very discomforting place to be. That's something that I learned from one of my guides.
I've always thought that if we all knew these gifts and we would exercise them, a completely different world would be. There are gifts out there that we don't even can imagine their existence. Gifts go beyond our inner and outside expectations, they act independently. This helps to go even further from expected and knowing them can benefit the collective significantly.
I've been fortunate enough in my work as a psychic, to see those gifts that are ready to do their job, I consider it a blessing and I feel so happy when my clients know them, exercise them and hear the calling.
This new year that's just starting, ask yourself what did you like to do as a child and what would you like to do NOW. The answer will most likely come from the voice of your gifts.
And remember that everything as simple, silly or crazy as it might seem, if you enjoy it, fulfills you with joy and happiness. Its a gift manifesting and you should give it the place it deserves, for the sake of all of us 😉 💖
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If you liked this entry, you feel identified and have doubts about which gifts you might have and how to exercise them. I can help you with a new service that I created especially for you, called Know and find your gifts, you'll be able to find it in this link
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